The process begins

Today, after about 8 months of flip flopping back and forth about what I was going to do with my life, I started my mission papers. It is a great feeling, I am full of happniess at my decision. The road to this point was confusing, full of stuggle and completed with prayer. Have you ever had a plan and in one, one short day have it destroyed? I started this year off not know what I was going to find, but I knew how I wanted it to end. Me entering the MTC. I planned it. I was ontrack to graduate with my Associates and take 18 months off to serve a mission. Everything was going perfect until, February 24, 2011. I met a boy. This is not a love story, it won't be ending with happily ever after, just stick with me okay. I saw him and instantly thought "Chelsey, maybe a mission is not for you."what the? I dismissed it, I wasn't going to miss out on this adventure because of some stupid boy. We talked maybe once over the next two weeks before we saw eachother again. We talked for a couple of hours, I found him to be funny, smart, athletic and heck I even thought he was cute. If I am being honest eventhough I wasn't really looking for a hubs, if I was, he would be the exact person I was looking for. My heart, however, was still thinking mission. We spent more time together, I told him my plans for graduating, and my desire to go on a mission. He thought that was pretty neat. Things kept interupting my plans. My plans for graduation fell through, I wasn't going to have my requirements done, my bank account was slowly losing the money I had put away for the 18 monhts I would be gone. I didn't even like my major I was so inlove with when I started. I had applied to other colleges incase the mission thing didn't work out. When I got accepted to multiple I didn't know which one I would chose. Ugh. I hate making decisions, and it just felt like I couldn't make the right ones. Mr. February didn't make anything better or easier. I could tell that I was falling for him, and I knew he was falling for me. I started to become okay with the idea of us, we hung out a lot, and for a while everything was fine. One night we were talking when I brought up the mission topic, and how my preparations were going. I confessed I didn't know what to do anymore. He told me I could only know through prayer and fasting. Which I did, a lot. I wasn't getting an answer, I wanted to serve a mission, but part of me wanted to stay and fall in love. I knew I couldn't do both. We had just spent a whole week of being inseperable. I saw him everyday, and loved it. I loved him, I know I did. One night we were walking. I told him I was still thinking of a mission. We stopped. His words cut "Chelsey, you know I won't wait for you right?" He pulled his hand out of mine and walked away. I continued on walking with tears streaming down my face, I needed my answer. For the next little while I prayed, fasted, went to the temple, and read the scriptures. I got what I thought was my answer, about three weeks after our walk. I went to his apartment, I told him we needed to talk so we went for a walk. He told me he was sorry for what he said but that he had something to tell me, I let him go first. He told me he had gone on a couple of dates with a girl, he wanted to continue to date her, "she is the girl I need...and want." I felt sick. I knew I should have gone first. My head was down, I raised my head to looked him in the face. I simply replied, "my answer was you." Oh man was that awkward. He asked why I hadn't told him sooner, well I didn't know he was going to fall inlove with the first girl he went on a date after me. I walked away muttering something about asking again. Ugh. He didn't try to stop me, he didn't call me, we didn't hang out anymore. I would seem him on campus, he'd say hi and be all cute again but then I would remember her. Have you ever watched someone you love with fall inlove with someone else? I felt dead. I cried myself to sleep almost everynight. I put on a good front so no one would know. I had no idea what I was doing with my life. I finally broke down and called the only person who knew the whole story. She told me to ask again but to "ask the right question." Bah, typical. I was asking the right question. I kneeled down that night, and asked Heavenly Father what I needed to do from here. Nothing. Whatever. I continued going to class, not really hearing what anyone was saying, I didn't really care about learning. Stupid boy, ugh. The next Wednesday I was walking through the MC and spotted the Sister Missionary booth. I felt the need to stop. I listened to them talk, listened to them share their simple testimony. I asked if it was worth it to them, and the reasons they chose to serve a mission. One of them looked me in the eye and told me "because I needed to." For the first time in a really long time I felt peace. I knelt down when I got home and confirmed my decision with my Heavenly Father and felt his arms surround me with love. From there it became clear that a mission was my answer all along. Things started working out again. I was still hurting, but I needed this. I don't know why He made it so complicated, or if there was a purpose. As much as I hate to admit it I haven't stopped loving him. I dread the day they get married, and it's her he spends eternity with instead of me. I know one day I will find my own new and improved Mr. February but still, his loss right? Sometimes our plans change, we go through a time of uncertainty, but it is only because it helps us see what we truly need. It is for our growth, and learning. Everyday I learn more about what He has instore for me. While I didn't know if I would make it this far with my plans, I'm really glad I did. I don't know exactly what is going to happen but for now, I hope they call me on a mission. I am ready.

Home

No matter how long you have been gone it is always good to be home. This is my the view from my seat as we were landing. A sign of home. I like these mountains.

Fair Port Harbor

About 20 miles north of Kirtland lies one of the great lakes. Lake Erie is wonderful. It is suprisingly warm and surrounded by sandy beaches. It was perfect for swimming and building sand castles. I loved the light houses and the sail boats and all the different people. We all took turns being buried in the sand and playing in the water. It was just a great way to finish out our little road trip. I could definitely get used to living in a place like that.

Poor kid. Played to hard at the beach.

Kirtland

We continued north to hit Kirtland, Ohio. Another stop on the church history tour. It was quite the experience. I went with the expectation that it was going to be a lot like Nauvoo, not even close. It was little but still held so much history that I would definitely suggest it to anyone. It is owned by two different churches. The LDS church and the Community of Christ church (RLDS). The LDS owns the Saw mill, Newel K. Whitney store, Newel K. Whitney's home and the Johnson Inn. The store was my favorite part, it was the household of Emma and Joseph along with the school of the prophets. Learning about the school of the prophets was a whole experience of itself. The temple is owned by the reorganized church. We had to watch a movie at the beginning of each tour, and they both brought very different feelings to them. We were led around by a senior missionary couple from Twin Falls, Id, so that was nice. A taste of home. They had a strong spirit to them, and you could feel their testimony. I look forward to serving a mission with my hubs one day too. It was cool to walk in the places that Joseph Smith walked and taught, where he met with the apostles and received revelation. The temple was a unique experience it. It is a very plain, simple and beautiful building. You appreciate the sacrifice that the early saints had to face in order to bring it to the earth. We walked through the first floor then we walked up a flight of really, REALLY steep stairs. Looked around the second story court and then I sat in the pews about 20 feet from where the savior came to accept the building as his house. If you get the chance. Go. It was worth the 3 dollars. The last picture is from the stone quarry where they cut the stone for the temple. It was not what I expected. It was far away from the temple which made my appreciation of their sacrifice grow.

A treat

After we were done hiking, we drove up the rest of the way to Columbus area. After we checked into the hotel and ate dinner we decided we needed some delicious ice cream. Graeters was our choice. Super delicious ice cream is the only way to describe it. You can tell the kids really liked it too.

Hocking Hills

After a few days of being in Ohio we went and visited one of its many wonders. We headed out early Friday morning hitting one of the old country roads that took us through many small towns of southern Ohio. We stopped at this random historic sight called Seip Mound. Even after the forest guy helped us we were still a little unsure at what we were looking at, but whatevs. I guess it dates back to about 2000 years ago, and it was a sacred ground of some natives. A place where they buried their dead. After we walked around, we headed back to the car and drove up the next few miles to Hocking Hills national park. One of the most beautiful places I have ever been too. That doesn't really say much but still, it was gorgeous. We hit three hikes that were pretty easy, the longest one being a two mile loop through green scenery. The first one we went to was called Ash Cave. It was a wide expanse of massive rock, and waterfalls. Then we hiked over to Cedar falls, we walked down into a canyon that led to a waterfalls which poured into a natural pool of clean, clear water. The last one was Old Man's Cave. The whole hike was beautiful, it was old and everthing was covered in green moss. There were tunnels, bridges, waterfalls all along the way. We were tired and sweaty by the end but it was definitely worth it.

Ohio

I love Ohio. I love that it is so close to so many things. I love the trees. I love the food. I love the lightening bugs. I love the diversity. I love that the houses have characters. I love the people that live there, okay well maybe just a few of those. Anyway... on July 30th I hopped on a plane and flew to Ohio. When I got off the plane there was the cutest 5 year old waiting for me. She even had a sign. Don't worry she was accompanied by an adult. The first couple of days I just got settled in. We played volleyball, made bracelets, went shopping went swimming and worked out. I just loved being there. I loved the change. I saw a friend from school so that was nice. Life is good.

I taught her all I know about fashion.

I'm leaving on a jet plane.

Ever just need to get away? Well I did. So I boarded a plane to Ohio.